爱一个人要多少勇气、多少包容、多少体谅、多少迁就？
接受你，我用了多大的勇气，
选择相信你，付出了我的真心。
然而这一切一切，没有想象中的那么容易。
在你眼里，我就像个小孩，
一心只想得到你所有的爱，却不懂其中的无奈。
像个幼稚又不体谅的小孩，让你心烦，让你懊恼，让你受委屈。
其实，我感觉你可能后悔了，后悔自己选了一个不适合的人。
你常说我爱得自私，但除了大爱，有多少爱是大方的啊？
你可以说我霸道，我想拥有你霸占你，因为我爱你。
你可以说我小气，正是因为爱你，我无发忍受那些女生在你身边饶。
你可以说我莫名其妙，不知为什么爱上了你，感觉什么都不再重要，只想好好爱你，用尽全力把你抱紧。
自从遇上了你，除了你，我不想再爱上任何人。
所以，当我想要抱你时，可以不要把我推开吗？除了你，我不想让其他人碰我~
总是心疼你，舍不得发你脾气，
即使气了也是一下下而已。
可你，却可以狠心的丢下我一整天，
电话不接，信息不回 >.<
我一整天吃不下东西，睡不着觉，考试更是一题都没做到，整张草稿都是你的名字~
爱一个人，你会舍得让他流泪，让他担心，让他因为你把自己搞得一塌糊涂吗？
嗨>.<
我只是选择了爱你，但为什么要让我这么难过？？
我知道我有错，我也道歉了~
到底要怎么样你才肯接我电话，回我信息~
一整夜睡不着，一直抱着电话等你。
可是。。。。。。。。
那种感觉，比死还要辛苦~
说不出的想念，说不出的痛~
2012年5月23日星期三
你什么都不知道
我，错了吗？
不要总怪我太敏感，
其实，我只是没有安全感。
我自认不是一个很好的女朋友。
我总学不会迁就，学不会大方，
更学不会体谅~
我从未真正支持过你，从未真正了解过你~
每天吵着你，烦着你，闹着你~
除了为你制造麻烦，我更是你的包袱~
不可以说你不疼我，可是你就是那么的爱闹我；
而我却脆弱得即使只是小小的玩笑也受不了。
总是为了些小事伤心掉泪。
你老觉得我幼稚的像小孩，
但，你那不断的作弄，难道就不幼稚吗？
为你掉泪，是我真的在乎了，
又或许，是我太过在乎了~
很多时候，不知怎么开口，不知怎么反驳，我宁愿什么都不说~
直到撑不了的时候，才哭着发泄~
不知不觉，眼泪已成了我最好的朋友。
我很努力的，试着让你安心，
即使多么的不舒服都忍着痛，笑着对你~（除了胃痛）
但是总在我最需要你的时候，.............
是真的都那么巧，还是上天在考验我啊？
不管多么难过，我都撑着，假装没事的与你信息。
因为我知道，即使我哭了，即使我沉默了，都只会换来那几句＂up to you, whatever, anything.. take care.. etc"
那几句让我更难过的字眼。
有时，真的很想跟你赌气，不理你，不接你电话，不回你信息。
可是，我真的做不到。
我害怕失去你，害怕这样会惹你生气，害怕你又会说我幼稚。
你常说，不可以让我太开心，不然我就会爬到你头上去。
但，照理看来，其实都只有我在怕你。
你的自信告诉你，我绝对不会离开你，我不能没有你。。
对，我是真的很爱你，也不会离开你，
可是，可以不要利用我的舍不得，反复的伤害我吗？
爱哭，不等于幼稚，
脆弱更不是幼稚的象征！
因为爱你，我可以舍弃尊严，舍弃自己该有的矜持，只为了换来你的爱，即使只是那么一点。
面子真的那么重要吗？
当你真的爱上一个人，那一切一切，
真的那么重要吗？
突然的距离，我真的无法适应。
当初不该与你那些近那么好，
以至于突然的距离，突然的疏离，
可以让我那么的不好。
没有你，真的，我什么都做不了。
但，你知道吗？
不要总怪我太敏感，
其实，我只是没有安全感。
我自认不是一个很好的女朋友。
我总学不会迁就，学不会大方，
更学不会体谅~
我从未真正支持过你，从未真正了解过你~
每天吵着你，烦着你，闹着你~
除了为你制造麻烦，我更是你的包袱~
不可以说你不疼我，可是你就是那么的爱闹我；
而我却脆弱得即使只是小小的玩笑也受不了。
总是为了些小事伤心掉泪。
你老觉得我幼稚的像小孩，
但，你那不断的作弄，难道就不幼稚吗？
为你掉泪，是我真的在乎了，
又或许，是我太过在乎了~
很多时候，不知怎么开口，不知怎么反驳，我宁愿什么都不说~
直到撑不了的时候，才哭着发泄~
不知不觉，眼泪已成了我最好的朋友。
我很努力的，试着让你安心，
即使多么的不舒服都忍着痛，笑着对你~（除了胃痛）
但是总在我最需要你的时候，.............
是真的都那么巧，还是上天在考验我啊？
不管多么难过，我都撑着，假装没事的与你信息。
因为我知道，即使我哭了，即使我沉默了，都只会换来那几句＂up to you, whatever, anything.. take care.. etc"
那几句让我更难过的字眼。
有时，真的很想跟你赌气，不理你，不接你电话，不回你信息。
可是，我真的做不到。
我害怕失去你，害怕这样会惹你生气，害怕你又会说我幼稚。
你常说，不可以让我太开心，不然我就会爬到你头上去。
但，照理看来，其实都只有我在怕你。
你的自信告诉你，我绝对不会离开你，我不能没有你。。
对，我是真的很爱你，也不会离开你，
可是，可以不要利用我的舍不得，反复的伤害我吗？
爱哭，不等于幼稚，
脆弱更不是幼稚的象征！
因为爱你，我可以舍弃尊严，舍弃自己该有的矜持，只为了换来你的爱，即使只是那么一点。
面子真的那么重要吗？
当你真的爱上一个人，那一切一切，
真的那么重要吗？
突然的距离，我真的无法适应。
当初不该与你那些近那么好，
以至于突然的距离，突然的疏离，
可以让我那么的不好。
没有你，真的，我什么都做不了。
但，你知道吗？
2012年4月4日星期三
Upset
Very upset today ='(
Again... heart beating faster than usual and feeling pain!!!
this was just so unexpected.
Usually, nomatter how much of beer I drank, I never felt that way before.
But today, It's totally different story.
Drank not even a glass of teh tarik at Chawan den went to the Talk.
At 1st , I don't really feel that anythimg different.. just playing around with others, drink abit beer n having fun there.
But later on, heart started beating faster n abit hard to breath.
Guess this happened becoz of the Teh Tarik !!!
Really hv to say no to coffee n tea from now on!!
Omg, I hate that feeling so so so much.
Long time din really happen n seriously I never expected that It'll happen tonight.
--------------------------------------------------
Don't want him to drink so much,
so..... i rather drink myself...
and well, it's fair for game too if i drink it myself..
I really hv to gv myself a big clap that heart feeling pain n started hard to breath d, I still can act like ntg happen n smile in front of people.
Call me God please!!
I told him I don't wanna back home earlier, but nvr told him the real reason,
somemore told him some stupid things like, I don't wanna return coz i wanna be with him more n miss him so much...
Wish that he was by my side when I really needed him but I don't want him to worry about me.. damn contracdictory..
Suffering in pain n hard to breath, I just can't control my temper, simply fatt peii heii, shouted on him..
yet, when he drove fast, I really felt scared n more suffer.
haizzzzzz.. Anyway , it's all my fault n I'm sorry for everything.
Called some friends in car..
n all of them going night club..
i was like ' grrrrr, Wadafuq????'
Luckily one of my confo's friend is free,
ngam ngam back from club, waited me at pool side.
Once i reached condo, straight away 'fly' to meet her n asked her bring me to the clinic that I used to go.
As usual, pumpep oxygen and one injection.
aikszzzz........
I don't meant to argue or fatt peii heii with you..
I really wish that u can be with me when things happened but I don't want you to worry about me.. so that I was wondering should I tell u or not while I was in your car.
But now, since u don't wanna reply any single message, don't wanna ans my call, n even off your hp,
I think, I don't need to tell you anymore.
='(
Again... heart beating faster than usual and feeling pain!!!
this was just so unexpected.
Usually, nomatter how much of beer I drank, I never felt that way before.
But today, It's totally different story.
Drank not even a glass of teh tarik at Chawan den went to the Talk.
At 1st , I don't really feel that anythimg different.. just playing around with others, drink abit beer n having fun there.
But later on, heart started beating faster n abit hard to breath.
Guess this happened becoz of the Teh Tarik !!!
Really hv to say no to coffee n tea from now on!!
Omg, I hate that feeling so so so much.
Long time din really happen n seriously I never expected that It'll happen tonight.
--------------------------------------------------
Don't want him to drink so much,
so..... i rather drink myself...
and well, it's fair for game too if i drink it myself..
I really hv to gv myself a big clap that heart feeling pain n started hard to breath d, I still can act like ntg happen n smile in front of people.
Call me God please!!
I told him I don't wanna back home earlier, but nvr told him the real reason,
somemore told him some stupid things like, I don't wanna return coz i wanna be with him more n miss him so much...
Wish that he was by my side when I really needed him but I don't want him to worry about me.. damn contracdictory..
Suffering in pain n hard to breath, I just can't control my temper, simply fatt peii heii, shouted on him..
yet, when he drove fast, I really felt scared n more suffer.
haizzzzzz.. Anyway , it's all my fault n I'm sorry for everything.
Called some friends in car..
n all of them going night club..
i was like ' grrrrr, Wadafuq????'
Luckily one of my confo's friend is free,
ngam ngam back from club, waited me at pool side.
Once i reached condo, straight away 'fly' to meet her n asked her bring me to the clinic that I used to go.
As usual, pumpep oxygen and one injection.
aikszzzz........
I don't meant to argue or fatt peii heii with you..
I really wish that u can be with me when things happened but I don't want you to worry about me.. so that I was wondering should I tell u or not while I was in your car.
But now, since u don't wanna reply any single message, don't wanna ans my call, n even off your hp,
I think, I don't need to tell you anymore.
='(
2012年3月27日星期二
恢复正常
前阵子不知道为什么，为了旧恋情伤心不已~
一直以为是自己放不下，结果才发觉只是自己想多了！
太多的回忆，让我自己想多了。
大家还是很关心我，经常给我打电话。
而且，打来都是在批评她~
哈哈哈，他们的一字一句真的让我笑翻了天~
其实，我根本并不在乎~
她的好她的不好，与我无关。
之前，是我自己想多了~
同一时期里发生了太多事，
一个人时，想起了以前不管发生什么事都有他在身边，
那种无助的感觉一来，就崩溃了。
他真的很好很好！！
对我的细心，对我的爱护，真的，我永远忘不了。。
只是。。。。他脾气坏了点！
哈哈哈
不管怎样，还是希望他开心就好！
之前的打扰，对不起了！
我终于恢复正常了！！！
一直以为是自己放不下，结果才发觉只是自己想多了！
太多的回忆，让我自己想多了。
大家还是很关心我，经常给我打电话。
而且，打来都是在批评她~
哈哈哈，他们的一字一句真的让我笑翻了天~
其实，我根本并不在乎~
她的好她的不好，与我无关。
之前，是我自己想多了~
同一时期里发生了太多事，
一个人时，想起了以前不管发生什么事都有他在身边，
那种无助的感觉一来，就崩溃了。
他真的很好很好！！
对我的细心，对我的爱护，真的，我永远忘不了。。
只是。。。。他脾气坏了点！
哈哈哈
不管怎样，还是希望他开心就好！
之前的打扰，对不起了！
我终于恢复正常了！！！
2012年1月29日星期日
CNY 2012
Happy Chinese New Year !!
It's the 7th day of CNY today, the so called ' Human Day ' , Happy Birthday to Everyone too!!
Long time didn't update my blog already!!
Gonna start back my blogging life very soon.
Hmmnnn..
Nothing special happen this recently and nothing much to say.
Show you guys some picha that I've took in this CNY ! <3
It's the 7th day of CNY today, the so called ' Human Day ' , Happy Birthday to Everyone too!!
Long time didn't update my blog already!!
Gonna start back my blogging life very soon.
Hmmnnn..
Nothing special happen this recently and nothing much to say.
Show you guys some picha that I've took in this CNY ! <3
2012年1月16日星期一
2012年1月3日星期二
Upset(T_T)
Wonder why is this world so complicated.
Haiz >.<
It's 2012!!!
Time flies like a wink.
Recalled about the past twenties..
From a little baby to children, to teenager and finally 21st this year, which can be counted as adult.
I'm no longer the who I was anymore.
I just wanna be myself, wanna have some normal life that a twenty over girl should have. Yet, I just couldn't be.
I'd experienced so much things that a twentieth girl wouldn't be experienced.
Know so much things that a twentieth girl should'nt know.
Should I felt happy coz I know more than others, mature than others or felt sad that although I know so much, but I'm just feeling upset for all that?
Life is so stress.
I'm so lost and don't know what to.
Noone really understand me,
noone really know what I want,
and noone I can really believe.
Crying all the way while I'm writing blog and recalling my past.
过去的一切已经回不去了，
未来的路我又该何去何从？
Haiz >.<
It's 2012!!!
Time flies like a wink.
Recalled about the past twenties..
From a little baby to children, to teenager and finally 21st this year, which can be counted as adult.
I'm no longer the who I was anymore.
I just wanna be myself, wanna have some normal life that a twenty over girl should have. Yet, I just couldn't be.
I'd experienced so much things that a twentieth girl wouldn't be experienced.
Know so much things that a twentieth girl should'nt know.
Should I felt happy coz I know more than others, mature than others or felt sad that although I know so much, but I'm just feeling upset for all that?
Life is so stress.
I'm so lost and don't know what to.
Noone really understand me,
noone really know what I want,
and noone I can really believe.
Crying all the way while I'm writing blog and recalling my past.
过去的一切已经回不去了，
未来的路我又该何去何从？
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